Two men on opposite sides of the world are thinking exactly the same thing.

One is tightrope walking, the other is having a blow job with a 86 year old woman.

What are they both thinking?



































"Don't look down, Don't look down"!!

So Shakespeare walks into a pub and the landlord says " you're Bard"

Jonothan Ross has been arreasted for stealing cooking utensils from Asda. He later stated hefelt "It was a whisk worth taking....."

similar effect on me when i first heard it, just like the baby polar bear joke......

I was in a pub quiz once and the question was asked "what's the name of the Greek mythological creature, half man, half beast?" Some guy (in a west Yorkshire accent) shouts out:- "BUFFALO BILL?" He won the quiz!

What baby Polar bear joke.. Do tell GraftonRed

Stevie Wonder plays a 3 hour concert in tokyo. At the end he asks if there are any requests & a japanese man at the front shouts: "Play a jazz chord". So Stevie plays 15 minutes of perfect Harlem Jazz. Then the same man shouts: "No! Play a jazz chord". So Stevie says "If you can do better you slinty eyed bast#*d come up and have a go" So the Japanese man sits at the piano, picks up the microphone and sings....................................................













"A JAZZ CHORD TO SAY A RUV YOU......."

whats the difference between a hedgehog and a bus full of rovers fans?



All the pr1cks are on the inside

Stevie wonder got a cheese grater got christmas.....he says its the most violent book he has ever read!!!

Slight variation one on sportstalk tonite that made me chuckle:



Man walks into a pub in Hull and spots Evander Holyfield drinking at the end of the bar.



Man: Ey Up Evander!. I'll buy you a pint.



Holyfield: No, I'm alright. I've got half 'ere.



Buddum Tish.